One year since the Corona pandemic hit us and turned everything upside down … to be completely honest, I dont really know what to write anymore.
Even if you´re not infected by the virus yet, we are all sick from it.
( Reviewing this text now just before I publish it, a few weeks after I actually started writing it, I realize that my mood really goes up and down, depending on external factors like the situation with the pandemic, my job situation and other Corona related stuff. I feel much better now, still sick and tired of this pandemic for sure, but in a better place. )
This pandemic is a like a wet blanket that just weights us down.
It´s like nothing is really real anymore, we just keep waiting for this to end so we can get our lives back. And I feel that it´s making me less on top of things, I´m having a hard time levelling up when I need to, that extra gear that I can always just kick in – it´s not there right now. Well ok, it´s there but I have to push it much harder to get in gear. Of course there are good and bad days, but it rains more often on the good ones.
Nobody calls you to do something fun, you can´t go anywhere doing something fun like you used to, when you meet your parents or friends you have keep this damn distance. I HATE THIS DISTANCING. I dont know how many times I´ve told my sweet daughter the same thing over and over again, ” honey, as soon as Corona is over you can have sleep-overs with your friends”, or “we can go the zoo / museum / fun park / playground / as soon as this stupid corona is over”. Everythime I say that or tell her not to touch this or that, I just hope that she doesnt get totally screwed up from this pandemic. Will the kids really be alright?
It´s like we´re all in a Corona induced coma or something, you´re kind of sick even if you´re not actually infected. Yet. Or have I been infected? I dont know, maybe I should get another antibodies-test.
It´s been such a long time since I published in this blog, and I dont want to be slowed down by not having the energy to write right now. I want to publish my photos anyways, even if they are not sorted into categories. I know there are some photos, maybe many even, that would benefit from being put in a more clear context, to be better understood. Or maybe put together alongside with certain photos to show a better contrast or some other meaning. Like the photos from the streets in Stockholm, with many people crossing the street at the same time – to be honest I dont know if its a good or totally worthless photo.
But I just realized that its not the most important thing, the important thing is that I show what´s happening, I document and capture the reality in this pandemic – Corona Made Me Do It – and so if the reality is streets full of people, then my photos will reflect that, and show that in an honest way. If I ever make a book or exhibition with this project, then I can hopefully get some curated help and support to better categorize the photos, right now I just wanna post the photos and show them to the world.
I think maybe I´m trying to make “beautiful” photos with awesome compositions and super cool content, since in much of my professional work I must produce nice looking content for clients, so it´s such a contrast to this documentary project where I can just shoot on the go and capture the grim and dirty reality. Hmm, I feel again that writing really is therapy for me hahaha. Note to self, write more.
So what I did now is that I just took my selections of photos taken from like October until yesterday, split them in half and post up until Christmans now, and in a few weeks I´ll post the next part with photos taken this year.
The title of this post, ” For Whom The Bell Tools ” is a song by Metallica from the -84 album Ride The Lightning. I chose this as the title because that´s the feeling I get when looking through the photos from later September / early October until today. People were thinking that Corona was starting to ware off, that the pandemic was over and that they could start to relax now, not keeping the distance anymore and live like normal. But then Corona hit harder than before and more and more people got infected and sick again. It was soon all over the society again and we had even harder restrictions by the government. So looking at the photos of people waiting in line close to eachother at Black Friday, or not using facemasks in the subways and standing way to close to others, I think to myself ” I wonder how many of these people got sick?”. Who will get sick and who wont? Who will just get a little sick and who will die? It´s seems to be a lottery where anyone can die and the next one doesnt feel anyhting.
So, nobody knows for whom the bell tools.
Oh by the way, in only 2 months we will have a little baby boy, thats totally awesome and I cant really wrap my head around the fact that we will have another child – a son. 2020 wasn´t totally a worthless year after all.
Hope you like the photos, have a great Easter!
COMING UP NEXT!
For Whom The Bell Tools PT 2 – more photos from this pandemic winter.